by Carla Collier
It is ‘back to school” time and the emotions are mixed around my home. There is some anticipation about seeing friends again, some sadness about saying goodbye to the carefree days of summer, a little excitement about ‘back to school’ shopping and a degree of anxiety about the unknown as a new school year begins. Will I like my teacher(s)? Will I have any classes with my friends? Who will I sit with at lunch and on the bus? Will I make the team?
I can still remember having those anxious thoughts even though it has been many years since my last day of school! How can we help the children in our lives overcome these fears and have positive feelings and expectations about school? Here are a few ideas that may be helpful:
- Pray for and with them about the new school year. Pray for their teacher(s), class, principal, bus driver, and friends both old and new. God hears and answers our prayers and prayer helps us release our anxieties and fears to God who loves us and gives us His peace as we trust Him (Philippians 4:6-7).
- Be a good listener. As you drive to get school supplies, ask how they feel about the new school year: what they are most looking forward to and if they have any worries. Some of their concerns you may be able to help them solve, the others you can pray about. Often just talking through issues brings perspective and helps them know they aren’t alone facing their fears.
- Familiarity brings comfort. For preschoolers and lower elementary children, have a picnic at the school playground the week before school starts. Don’t miss the opportunity most elementary schools provide to meet the teacher and see the classroom. For middle schoolers and high schoolers, walk the school with them to find their classes and help them find their locker and practice the locker combination.
- Encourage friendliness. Children who are shy can have an especially hard time adjusting to new classes and schools. Encourage them to just be friendly: to smile, say “hello” and make others feel special. As they begin to focus on others they will become more comfortable themselves and make new friends.
- Encourage involvement. Help your child find ways to get involved in the school. Clubs and extracurricular activities are very important in developing friendships, interests and skills. It is critically important for children to not get “lost in the crowd”; they need a group where they belong. Scouts, sports, drama, service organizations, foreign language clubs, band, Jr.ROTC — there are opportunities to match a wide variety of interests. (These will also be important when applying for colleges.)
- Focus on the positive. We have a tremendous opportunity to set the tone in our homes and conversations by choosing to look for the good in every circumstance. Our children will learn by example and will tend to follow our lead in choosing their attitudes.
As we pray for discernment and wisdom, God will help us guide the children He has entrusted to us. One of the most important ways we can help our children is to remind them that they are never alone: that God is with them the first day of school and every day.
We would love to hear your comments or suggestions for first day of school ‘jitters’.
